Hoo R Ower Dumm Frenz? (1949)

From the March 1949 issue of the Socialist Standard

Every few years well over a thousand men and women push themselves forward in an effort to get elected to parliament. The six hundred odd successful candidates assume the responsibility, so they would have us believe, of looking after the interests of us all. They place themselves before us as men and women of intelligence and integrity, who are best able to deal with the manifold problems of modern society. Of course, there is no shortage of these problems today. We humble members of the working class have no doubts what these problems are. In a world in which there is so much poverty, with its attendant evils, ill-housing, malnutrition, overwork, etc., and in which the threat of ever greater wars is always imminent, we have decided views about the relative importance of these problems.

But our legislators have different views. The abolition of war and poverty are apparently not items of paramount interest for these parliamentary pundits.

With the re-introduction of the pre-war practice whereby members may introduce private Bills for consideration by parliament, some of these individuals have had a recent opportunity of showing what they are really interested in. And how they have enjoyed themselves!

Altogether, 26 of them have prepared Bills and nine of these 26 have given up mankind in despair in favour of other members of the animal kingdom. The Daily Express (28/1/49) tells us about them and their doings.

Brigadier C. Peto (Conservative, Barnstaple) has turned his back on the problems of working class housing conditions in favour of better conditions for pussies and puppy dogs in pet shops.

Mr. J. A. Sparks (Labour, Acton) is believed to have a Bill for restricting blood sports but we are confident that he will not include the well known blood sport of compelling members of the working class to slaughter one another in millions in their master's wars

Mr. Seymour Cocks (Labour, Broxtowe) wants to abolish the hunting of deer, badgers, otters and hares. (Maybe he is after their votes, too.)

"Do not dock the horses* tails” is how it might be put by Sir Dimoke White (Conservative, Fareham), Please note "horses’ tails” not “workers’ wages.” These are but a few examples of the efforts of these Westminster political buffoons. The prize clown of the lot is undoubtedly Mr. Mont Follick (Labour, Loughboro) who really believes that a scheme of spelling reform (see example above) will help the chances of international peace.

We wonder; are we supposed to laugh or vomit? We have a feeling it will be the latter.

W. and G.