The Holy Pancake (1979)

From the September 1979 issue of the Socialist Standard

Competition is stiff in the icon stakes. Apart from the Turin Shroud, there is the Holy Pancake. This Beatific Flapjack surpasses your ordinary common or garden Eucharist in which the Blessed Trinity (all one of them) appear in the form of a biscuit, for imprinted on the dough of this specimen are the facial features of The Carpenter himself. It arrived in the frying pan of a devout Catholic woman in the United States, and has not putrified in months. The Miraculous Chapati is said to have healing properties: her husband, who had a drink problem, has not touched a drop since he saw The Countenance!